Friday, September 5, 2014

Arthur





My sweet baby boy.

I never thought I would be writing this post.

I had so many dreams for your future. 

Pictures I wanted to take, stories I wanted to share with you. 

To see you get your first tooth.

To watch you take your first step.

To chase you while you ran. 

So many moments I longed for, yet I will never get to see.

My heart is aching...I've  never known such sorrow and grief.

I'm choosing to remember and cherish every precious moment that I had with you.

I don't know why your life was so short.


For one so small you left an impact the size of the universe on each of our hearts.

Every person you came in contact with fell in love with you.

You are now in the arms of Jesus and I can't think of a better place to be.

You no longer struggle to breathe but now my sweet boy you breathe heavenly air.

I long for the day I will be able to see you face to face.

Although my earthly body hurts without you, 

I rejoice that someday my sweet boy I'll carry you 

again and 

Heaven is so much sweeter knowing you're there.

From the moment I held you in my arms my life was better just because I had you in it.



We shared a special bond - I'd lovingly called you "my best accessory". 

The nannies would tease me when they'd hand me "my baby"...


Never far from my arms or my reach you loved to be carried in my sling 

and 

I loved having you there.




When the day would finish I'd go and bring you in my arms where we'd cuddle 

and I'd feed you your night bottle of milk.


Many nights after an exhausting day we'd fall asleep on the couch only to 

have someone snap a picture to tease me later. 

Now those very pictures bring me to tears.









Together you and I would live stream my home church in Phoenix.


                        It's those little moments that make me miss you the most.



Missing you makes it hard to breathe.

Oh my sweet boy I loved you so very much.

Every fiber of my being hurts without you.
   
  
          You even attended my little brothers wedding as we skyped in the middle of the night.

                                    You, my baby boy, were never far from my side.



Just two weeks ago we painted your foot prints together.

Little did I know it would be the last art project we'd share.

You would make me laugh with your expression when you felt the paint on your sweet baby feet.

Oh my sweet baby boy how I long to hold you just one more time.

To kiss those precious baby cheeks and stare into your most beautiful brown eyes.

You my love were perfect in every way.

I am so humbled that God would allow me to carry you for two precious months.

I will cherish the memories and moments that I held you.

You showed me how to love deeply.

For that I am eternally grateful.

I pray that my heart doesn't grow calloused to love, but instead loves deeply and fiercely.

Because my sweet Arthur you are worth every painful breath, every sob and every tear.

You are worth it all and even more.




My sweet baby boy I will love you forever and always.

I will always carry you in my heart...

Until I hold you again.

all my love.

Xoxo





"As one whom his mother comforts, 
so I will comfort you..."
Isaiah 66:13a

Thank you for all your love and prayers.  
We can feel each and every one.

12 comments:

Anna Wood said...

Oh Emma. I weep with you and for you. This breaks my heart. But as you said, there is no better place to be than in the arms of Jesus. Precious Arthur will be remembered.

Teresa Zowada said...

Oh Emma, my heart is aching for you. Your post brought me to tears. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Reading about the loss of sweet Arthur is making me realize that my problems I face aren't so bad at all.
I'm praying for you and everyone that is grieving.
Remember that our heavenly Daddy is always there for you to run to!

Teresa

Candidly Carico said...

Emma - I am very sorry for your loss. It is apparent that Arthur left a legacy, it is certainly portrayed in the pictures. I pray a deep peace for your heart as you mourn the precious life of Arthur.

Rob said...

So sorry to hear of this Emma. Definitely praying for you and all the other staff as you deal with this.

mkrichert said...

Praying for comfort for you in the days to come. There are no words that can ease grief you are feeling. I am so sorry is all I can say. Hugs from Montana ~Megan

Queen Zara said...

Praying for your precious heart to heal. He is the God of all comfort.

Anonymous said...

Emma...I am sooo sorry for your loss. I cry and feel with you. Such tremendous pain. Many blessings on you, you are so special and are doing a great job. What a difference you made to Arthur. How blessed he was that he was SO loved and pampered in the last months of his life. Keep on loving!
Judy

Anonymous said...

So sorry, so precious and sweet. Beautiful love for a sweet blessing. Thank you Jesus we can live eternally with you.

praying

God bless you all

Erika

Anonymous said...

So sorry, so precious and sweet. Beautiful love for a sweet blessing. Thank you Jesus we can live eternally with you.

praying

God bless you all

Erika

juf Ineke said...

My heart aches for you... I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child. Sending you lots of love and comfort from Above. X

robin said...

I am so sorry... *hug* I'll keep you and those who loved him in my prayers.

Amy said...

So sorry for the loss of your sweet baby. He was blessed to have your love during his short life here on earth. Praying Jesus comforts you as you grieve!